Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Committee of Voices

Some days my head is quiet and I think they've gone to sleep
Then something hits a mem'ry and my eyes begin to weep
I wish they'd all be silent for they wear me to the bone
Why can't I find the "off" or "mute" like I have on my phone?

Some days they like to chuckle, some days they love to yell
But either way, they make me feel a pris'ner in a cell
They clatter and they like to make a ruckuss in my head 
Since they won't stop their talking guess I'll just go off to bed!

I have a whole committee of strange voices in my brain
They started many years ago and sing the same refrain
"You know that your are worthless" or "If only people knew"
"You have to do that better" and "Give up, you know you're through."

But not so many years ago, a friend took time to say
"You know my dear, I think we need to stop right here and pray."
She pointed out a lot of lies that echoed in my head
And told me how to hear the Truth and follow it instead.

"God never meant for you to sit and battle this alone.
He gave his Word, it tells us truth, Now take this with you, home."
So when my whole committee of strange voices came to jeer
I started speaking really loud, "My God said have no fear!"

I must admit, it seemed real odd to talk aloud at home
My kids would spy around the wall and see I was alone.
I know some days they must have thought that mom was crazy, yes
But I had found the joy that comes from God's sweet tenderness.

I am too glad to tell you this, that voices can be snuffed
of all their lies and cruel deceit, replaced with God's great love!
"Be still and know that I am God... You are my precious child!"
My heart's so full of peace and joy, not often is it riled.
                                                                       by Candi Haidle

Now, please do not worry!  I am truly NOT possessed, alright?  Never was!  I wrote this because it captures how it feels when I battle in my mind.  Lies are powerful if they are believed.  Remember, Satan has been a pro for a loooooong time at getting people to buy into his lies.  God's truth is what sets us free!  This friend who told me to "just start speaking truth right out loud" and "quit letting that garbage rattle around in there," helped me to understand why it's so good to have God's Word hidden in my heart.  I haven't found the mute button for the voices in my head, but they are very, very quiet compared to the committee of screamers they used to be.  I hear Jesus, my Shepherd's voice, instead.  And on the days when a voice wants to whisper something that makes me doubt or fear, I just ask..."Jesus, is that true?"  He is so faithful to answer.  And his voice is so sweet!  (ah....peace.)


  1. Love the poem, and another Amen:)

  2. You are right... I love your poem. :)
    It says it all!
    Dad would love it too!

    1. Thanks Mom! I knew you would like it :) I thought about dad a lot while I wrote it. And the idea of the title actually came from Jonny. It's a family affair. Thanks for reading it.